Wednesday, 30 January 2013

Bullet To The Head Review

With a title such as Bullet to the Head staring a Sylvester Stallone with what looks like impressively low body fat of around 12% and directed by 48 Hrs (1982) and Red Heat (1988) Walter Hill, the story of this film was never likely to be overly complicated. 

Tuesday, 29 January 2013

Bullhead Review

As Al Pacino's Tony Montana from Scarface plainly illustrates, indulging in one's own contraband is not necessarily the best choice in business.  Nominated for an Oscar in the Best Foreign Film category in 2012, writer and director Michael R. Roskam's Bullhead focuses on another type of drug business, that of the Belgian bovine hormone mafia. The usual parties of the human drug world are swopped in Bullhead for quiet dinners and cattle sheds. 

Sunday, 27 January 2013

Dharma Guns: French Experimental Punk Cinema

In Dharma Guns, a man suffers a terrible jet-ski accident. Waking up partly amnesiac, he goes after a mysterious pharmatical corporation in the strange island country of Los Estrellas, which manufactures a medication he has become reliant on, which seems to turns its subjects into zombies in too high dosage!

Tuesday, 15 January 2013

The FilmLand Awards 2013

The BAFTA awards, a glacial snooze fest where American stars pretend to care. Golden Globes who once gave an acting award to Pia Zadora. The Oscars who picked Crash over Brokeback Mountain. Now that we have established that film awards are worthless, time for the real deal, the FilmLand Awards 2013.

Friday, 11 January 2013

May I Kill U?

What a brilliant title. It perfectly conveys what the film is trying to do, ie a black comedy with a very British flavour. Shame however than the finished product does not live up to the promise of its title!
Let's face it, there is a bit of a Daily Mail reader in the most liberal among us, it happens in the best families. Who hasn't harboured some murderous instincts while being confronted with some ASBO people at large, in public transport, in the streets, vandalising public properties, being too noisy or worst crime of all, skipping a queue (heaven forbid!). Yet we are in Britain so the the worst most of us will do is roll our eyes and tried to convey our utter disgust in the least threatening fashion possible.

Wednesday, 9 January 2013

V/H/S - A Non Horror Fan Report

Amongst many of my Twitterverse and Actual Real film friends I am somewhat of an anomaly in that I am not a Horror film fan. Whenever anyone writes film reviews or features for various publications, a standard question is: 'Are there any types of films you are not interested in reviewing?' I tend to tick the 'Horror' box with the recipient usually swiftly saying 'Oh I Love Horror films. Why don't you?' So why don't I make a crazed dash towards my local cinema as if my life depended on it whenever the latest slasher film or nightmare fuelled Horror wonder splats itself across a big screen?

Saturday, 5 January 2013

Texas Chainsaw 3D: The Worst Film Of 2013

Why do fools rush in? What is it with us, fans of horror films? Why do we sit through hours of drivel to get our fix, why do we rush to watch films upon their release knowing full well they are going to be rubbish? I cannot think of a genre which has more devoted, forgiving fans. Perhaps it is because, even within a poor film, we hope to find a decent quota of bloody mayhem, enough to satisfy us. So The Texas Chainsaw 3D. Bloody perhaps, fun, definitely not.